Kingdom Hearts

System: PS2
Developer: Square Enix
Publisher: Buena Vista Games

This game is rather famous to Final Fantasy and Disney fans alike. It's just too bad you don't get to play as any cool characters. Instead, you play as a sweet, after-school-special boy named Sora, and you are accompanied by the two biggest doofs in Disney history: Donald and Goofy.

So you get this big dorky key as your weapon. I can't stand to look at that stupid weapon until I get a cooler version of it, like Lionheart or even the Crabclaw. At least these blades look more like a weapon and not like a big foam finger.

So let's get to the ratings, shall we?

Story: 5/5
Characters: 4/5

There are major spoilers ahead, but if you haven't played it yet, you're a loser.



Story

Ok, so there's lots of doors. I get that.

You play as Sora, a kid chosen by the Keyblade. (Of course weapons can choose their masters based on the strength of their hearts. It's the same idea as being chosen by a heart attack.) After your worlds are torn apart, you land in Traverse Town and meet up with a whole bunch of Final Fantasy characters that are trying to put the worlds back together as well as finding out about Ansem's reports and the heartless.

You get to travel to plenty of worlds: Agrabah, Halloween Town, Tarzan's Jungle, Atlantica, Monstro, and Wonderland. It appears that the Heartless are after the princesses of heart... which aren't in half of these worlds, so I'm not really sure why I'm bothering. If the princesses of heart are in danger, why am I wasting my time in Winnie the Pooh's world? And why is Alice a princess of heart?

Strengths:
-- Even though the story has a cartoon atmosphere, the basis of the story is medium weight philosophical. It looks at the components of a human heart.
-- Interesting bad guy: Ansem is lost to the darkness, so when Riku gets lost himself, Ansem possesses his body to attack Sora.

Weaknesses
-- The fact that I'm off wasting time in worlds that have no princesses in them is irritating. I understand I'm trying to find Ansem's reports and destroy the Heartless, but if the bad guys are going after the princesses, shouldn't I be saving them?
--Not exactly what I'd call plot twists. It's rather obvious that Riku works against you most of the game and then Kairi is a princess of heart.


Characters

Sora
This character gets a lot of crap and after you play this game, you'll know why. He may be 14 years old in the game, but he acts more like 11 or 12. Although, I have to say, I am glad to be playing as an optimistic character, not like in Final Fantasy where every main character hopes for the worst and doesn't really care either way.

Improvements: Sora pops out with insights like trash magazines come out with creatures from the swamp. Can we find out why how he came to these conclusions? He just busts out saying “Kingdom Hearts is light!” and hey, what do you know, it is. Huh?


Donald and Goofy
All I have to say is this: Thank God for subtitles. Even though I loved Donald Duck and understood everything he said when I was kid, I don't understand a dang word he says now.

These characters are almost useless. They knock me off stuff, they don't contribute too much to the story, and they talk to Sora like he's 6 years old even though he could take both of them out in one shot.

Improvements: It would be nice if they actually helped Sora figure out stuff. They're kind of just there for the ride, which is almost pointless. Why don't either of them come up with some insight?


Riku
So Riku is your best buddy in the whole wide universe before he steps into a dark pit and then spends the rest of the game trying to be better than you. Kudos to Square for setting up the fact that Sora and Riku are competitive by nature, and that Riku trying to be better than Sora isn't really that unpredictable. Riku is a complex character, for the fact that even though he works for the dark, he's still keeping an eye on his friends from his childhood. He reminds me of an older brother figure, other than the fact that I'd totally love to make out with him.

Improvements: Why is Riku not afraid of the darkness? He just jumps into a black pit and tells Sora to join him. I know Riku doesn't think it's a jacuzzi. What is he thinking?

Ansem
You only hear rumors about this character until at the end where he just kind of pops out and goes “Ta-da!” He's your typical bad guy: long hair, defies gravity, wants power, yada yada yada. I do, however, like the insane researcher angle. He's consumed by his research to the point that he will kill his oppositions. Not the type of person I'd like to be up against at a science fair.

Improvements: Why is he stealing all these hearts? The guy is far from Don Juan and I doubt he works for the American Heart Association. I hear that he seeks great power and wisdom, but honestly, that's kind of weak.

Final Say
I'm trying to suppress the part of me that is screaming “Play this! It's the best game everz!” because it's the same part of me that loves the gameplay and characters. The writing critic side of me, however, says that even though the plot is deep and complex, some characters lack depth and the writing resembles Saturday morning cartoons. But if that's the kind of writing your interested in, I recommend taking a look at it.

Other notes: Aeris got stabbed. Why is she in Kingdom Hearts? And where's Rinoa?!