Rhapsody

Rhapsody: A Musical Adventure
System: Nintendo DS (with an earlier PS1 release)
Release: 2008
Company: NIS America
Rating: E

It occurs to me that even though this is a writing blog, long posts might be slightly intimidating. Even as a writer and an avid reader, I too skip internet articles that are more then 2 pages long. So I'm going to try something a little different: I'm going to split my reviews up into sections. That way I can give a fuller analysis and you guys won't have to scroll down and drop your jaws at the length of my rambling. I would love feedback from you guys!






Kudos to NIS America for making a rare type of a game: a musical. How many games do you know that burst into song? Grant you, Rhapsody is a cheesy, light game, which makes the idea of a musical more appealing. But, hey, you know what? Let's make every game a musical. I'd love to watch Roman from GTA4 break into song about how great Liberty City is.


Plot 3/5
It was a little hard to give this game a rating, due to the fact that even though this plot isn't exceptionally deep and the characters aren't highly complex, it IS meant to be a light-hearted game. I would like to judge the game fairly based on what it is: a musical with puppets. You can't really judge that harshly, can you?

The premise of the game is that you are Cornet, your usual tomboy protagonist who talks to puppets. After being saved by the prince (the only prince in this game, despite the huge world. And no, the frog kingdom DOESN'T count.) Cornet enters a contest to become the prince's bride. And she wins. Ooo. Shocker there.

And as the two love birds are getting to know each other (and by "know each other" I mean have short, awkward conversations that lead absolutely no where), a mysterious sorceress bursts in, falls in love with the prince, and accidently turns him to stone.

So the rest of the game, you are trying to collect 5 elemental stones that will save the prince. Maybe. Kinda.

The purpose of the 5 stones eludes me. At first, they are mentioned as if they are needed to turn the prince back to human form. All right, I can go with that; magic to undo magic. That would explain why the antagonist wants them as badly as I do.

But in the end, they are used to open a portal to the antagonist's castle. My antagonist doesn't need a portal, so why does she need the stones.

And during this, there is another antagonist working in the background, that makes no real dent on the story other then the fact that he brings out the final boss.

Really? Aren't we tired of this whole boss-who's-not-REALLY-the-last-boss bit in RPG video games? (I'm talking to YOU, Final Fantasy.)

Overall, the story is entertaining, but I suppose I have to give the characters credit for that, not the actual plot. The plot has moments that make absolutely no sense,

Strengths:
--> Solid, basic plot. Nothing terribly complex, but it's consistent and has plenty of classic RPG elements.
--> Comedy. The game makes fun of itself at times, making it hard to hold a grudge against it for being so cheesy.
--> Musical numbers. Even though 1/3 of the songs is the same song rewritten, the idea of musical numbers within a video game is quite original.

Weaknesses:
--> Character development. I was entertained with Kokuru until I found out it was, in fact, Cornet's mother's spirit in a puppet. It completely confused me on why Cornet's mother's personality shifted so drastically while inside of a doll.
--> Antagonist Confustion. If Golonzo's creation is the final boss, why doesn't he appear more throughout the game? He hits on me and then runs away. (Just like in real life.)
--> Romance. The romance between the prince and Cornet. It's a little cliche and happens too fast. The prince saves Cornet, turns to stone, then declares his love for her for eternity. I think Cornet put it best when she said, "But we've barely talked for five minutes!"



Part 2: Characters
Coming Soon

Image (C) NIS America

Crisis Core

Platform: PSP
Developer/Publisher: Square-Enix

I'm disappointed. I was all prepared to tear into Crisis Core's lack of substantial plot and dialogue; Ready to use my distaste with Final Fantasy 7 as a base for a lot of ranting and poking fun... And now I can't.

Thanks a lot.

If I wanted to review the game in general, I could tell you that the game is insanely easy, it has no replay value whatsoever, and the DMW is really irritating, but that's not what my blog is for. It's about game writing.

And the writing is actually good.

Well, at least plot-wise. There's still the mission writing and Aerith that I can have a rant-fest about, so it's all good.

Let's get to it, shall we?

Plot: 5/5

Characters: 4/5

Mission Writing: 2/5

If you've played Final Fantasy 7, I doubt there's really any spoilers here.


Plot

All right, so you play as Zack Fair, Cloud's old war buddy. You know, the guy Cloud spent half of FF7 thinking he WAS. So you get to watch as Zack flirts with Aerith, watches Shinra go to crap, and gets shot in the face at the end of the game.

FF7 seems to have a large amount of mad scientists. In this game, mad scientists are busy cloning people's genes and sticking them into random people to make some sort of ugly army.

For FF7 fans, you get to watch YET AGAIN Sephiroth find out that he's a human experiment, go nuts, burn down the town, and stab a couple people.

After you kill some random character named Genesis, your friends die, and Cloud is out of harm's way, you get rewarded by getting shot numerous times by the army and then dying.

Good times.

Strengths:

--> Follows the plot of FF7 with no hiccups

--> Easily mixes two genres together seamlessly: fantasy and sci-fi. People who enjoy one but not the other, will still appreciate the plot

--> Emotional dialogue and strong character connections

Weaknesses:

--> Individuals not familiar with sci-fi plot complexity (or Final Fantasy 7 for that matter) might get slightly confused at what's going on. There's a whole lot of clones floating about which makes things complicated.

--> I have the army and all of Shinra after me and I don't even know why...

--> You mean to tell me that the entire army riddled Zack with bullets, but he still had enough time to talk to Cloud in a dramatic scene before dying? Unlikely.

Characters

Zack

Square Enix is actually doing a good job in keeping to the story of FF7. The character in those blocky FF7 flashbacks is the same character portrayed in Crisis Core: fun, loyal, hard-core, and squat-happy. Zack is a strong character, chasing after all the people who have betrayed him in order to help them.

I like this character for a couple reasons. 1, he shows his loyalty to his friends in a non-after-school-special sort of way (*cough*Sora*cough*) and 2, he's a little naïve and has normal weaknesses. I like a bad-ass character as much as the next person, but I am so BORED with characters that have no weaknesses, flaws, and have a plan for everything. You know, the guy that comes out of an explosion with a cleanly pressed suit and perfectly cut hair.

The great thing about this game is you get to see why Zack meant so much to Cloud. Other than an annoying giggle-fest about the names of their hometowns, Zack and Cloud have a pretty honorable relationship. Zack carries Cloud through half of this game (Tifa carrying him for ¼ of the game and Cloud amazingly walking for himself—or leaning against a wall or laying flat on his face-- for another ¼.) and takes on numerous amounts of enemies in order to protect him.

Improvements: I know FF7 is against emotions of any kind, but Zack lost all his war buddies. Can he show a little anger or resentment? Some agony? 13 hours of this game and I get 2 scenes of him upset? Can I at least get some inner thoughts?


Cloud
I know this comment is on the borderline of blasphemy, but I have found a new respect for Cloud. Probably because I got to see him try to hold down his lunch after a helicopter ride. He's human now! I got to see his wimpy little butt get kicked over and over again, with Zack coming to his rescue.

My only question: He gets car sick, but if Sephiroth stabs him he can unrealistically use the blade as a see-saw to throw Sephiroth into machinery? Huh?



I have to say, I'm glad the story cleared up the whole clone mess. I was confused on if Sephiroth was a clone of the original Sephiroth, or Cloud was a clone of Sephiroth, or if Cloud was a clone of Steve Burton's character on General Hospital...


I mean, come on. There's even a girl with two kids that Burton's character is in love with, but can never seem to get together with. (If you didn't know, Steve Burton IS the English voice actor of Cloud.)

So as it turns out, Sephiroth is the “perfect monster” and once Cloud gets stabbed, some mad scientist injects him with Sephiroth's cells in order to create another monster like him. It's just too bad that Cloud is too weak towards the Mako and spends half the game as a zombie. Until his friend is shot, in which he magically snaps out of it for the dramatic end of the game. The dude can't walk for half the game and then all of a sudden he can pick up the Buster Sword and head towards Midgar. Yeah. That's how that works.

I have to say, watching Cloud go from motion-sick-dork to what he is in Advent Children is an interesting transition. I actually found him more interesting in Crisis Core, due to the fact that it shows his depth. When he complains about not being able to save anyone in Advent Children, you realize that by playing Crisis Core, he's sort of right. He gets in a couple good shots and that's about it. Which I like better. It's more realistic.

Improvements: Cloud is anti-emotion as well. His best friend dies, he does the usual “noooo!” that everyone in every game does, and then he thanks his dead friend? Confusion. Maybe he's not emotionless...just bipolar.


Aerith
Anyone who knows me, knows that I hate Aerith. But after playing Crisis Core and getting to know her character better, I have realized that I had good reason. She's irritating. Not to say that she's a badly developed character. In this game. In FF7, she still sucks.

The sweet and shy princess-like character is more annoying to me than the bad-ass emo characters Square Enix likes to recycle, and Aerith takes the cake when it comes to that genre.

Here's what bothers me about her: my friend dies and she talks about flowers, I make her a flower wagon that is perfectly suitable and she wants a do over, she writes Zack about the flowers... GET OVER THE STUPID FLOWERS.

Improvements: She lives in slums and she's watched constantly by Turks. Can't she have a bit of an attitude? Some spunk? Something OTHER than an obsession with flowers?!



Sephiroth

Sephiroth is actually one of my favorite villains because the dude is insane. In this game, he's perfectly honorable and loyal, until he finds out that he was a scientific experiment and then everything hits the fan and he goes berserk.

However, I do hate the whole “the universe is MINE!” crap, and it seriously needs to stop. He was betrayed by his father and a bunch of scientists, not the universe.

Improvements: The rule the world thing. I'm done with that.


Other Characters

Genesis: I love the whole poetic sort of character, mainly because they're so rare. Genesis has this crazed obsession with the Gift of the Goddess, like a seriously disturbed religious person. I'd like to know why he's so interested though.

Angeal: He's like the sweet uncle you adore. He pokes fun at you and tells you stories about life. And then he manipulates you into killing him and then after he dies, his clone protects you. Just like in real life.



Missions

All right the missions in this game were lame and I'm going to tell you why: They were all the same.

No, no. Seriously. I get a mysterious letter or someone wants to challenge me, I go to the middle of a field that has 2 boxes, and I find one lone monster by itself, kill it, and I'm done.

Square Enix seems to have put missions in this game to make it longer. (And maybe to show off Yuffie a little bit more.) That really seems to be it. They went to great lengths to describe what I'm doing, but they don't give me any info into why I should care or what happens after I'm done.



FINAL SAY
If you're a FF7 fan, you won't be learning more than you all ready know, but it's a good look into character development over time and relationship chemistry. If you're not a FF7 fan, I don't think you'll get much out of it. The characters won't have any real depth to you. I'd take a look into this game if you're either a sci-fi nut or a FF7 fan, but that's really about it.


Other notes: What is with Cloud's relationship commitment issues? How long do the fans have to wait before Cloud FINALLY gets together with Tifa? I mean, really.

Dead or Alive XTreme 2

Console: XBox 360
Developer: Team Ninja

This game has the deepest, more emotionally impacting storyline and characters that I have seen in the history of gaming.

Yeah. Right.

Let’s be honest: half of you don’t know what this game is, and the other half are surprised I’m writing about this game at all. The basis of the game is you choose to be one of 9 bikini-wearing Dead or Alive girls, then take an island vacation choosing between water and beach sports, such as volleyball or water skiing.

So why AM I making a review on this game?

All games have writing. Even for games in which the writing may seem like it has no purpose, there should still be an effort to bring across the characters and plot as strongly as possible. Even casual games need story.

That, and this game is really addicting.

So, to the fact that there are no spoilers or deep plot twists, feel free to read the entire post.

Characters: 2/5
Storyline: 2/5
Interaction: Great!

Zack
Zack scares me. This can be a plus or minus to an audience depending on your angle. But as a character, he stands out quite well. He is the comic relief, and he has the personality type that makes me believe that he would, in fact, pull up a desert island from the bottom of the ocean and trick a whole bunch of girls to escape on it so he can make cash.

Improvements: It’s his island, but there’s no interaction with him during the game. He gives you a present every night (creepy) but he never talks to you. If he’s in charge of the island, don’t you think he would check up on you?


Niki
Niki is meant to be the girl that is head over heals for her boyfriend. She plays it well. The problem with this is she almost lacks personality of her own. She’s sweet and seems to make a good partner with Zack, but I think she could use a little individuality.

Improvements: She can be her own person. Make her more than just “Zack’s girlfriend.”


Kasumi
According to the insert, Kasumi is a runaway ninja. For a ninja, is sure is sensitive. She’s more like a Disney princess than a trained assassin.

Improvements: Make the background match the character’s personality.


Hitomi
This girl is quite childlike. She reminds me of a 10 year old girl, not an 18 year old tournament fighter. I found this character a little bland. She seemed like a rather generic character, with nothing that really stood out.

Improvements: Have something about her that stands out!


Leifang
Leifang has the least amount of character depth out of any of the characters in this game. She’s far too generic, with nothing that stands out.

Improvements: Personality! Make her an individual.


Christie
Since there are so few girls with spunk in this game, thank God for Christie. She’s cold and rude, which fits her background as an assassin very well.

Improvements: Christie doesn’t seem to play well with others. This makes it hard for me to believe that she would try to play volleyball and tug of war with other girls.


Kokoro
While Hitomi reminds me of a 10 year old, Kokoro reminds me of a 5 year old. She’s constantly whining and worrying about her mother coming and taking her off the island. Other than that, she almost has the same traits as Kasumi, in the fact that she seems like a Disney princess.

Improvements: Add a little more maturity to this character. And why are both the Japanese girls these dainty and sweet little things?


Helena
Contrary to American stereotypes that make the French seem rude and selfish, Helena is a sweet girl that looks at the finer things in life. She is almost never rude and is very in touch with her surroundings. Way to go on going against stereotypes!

Improvements: Add a little more flavor to her. She’s got the sweet, now where’s the spicy?


Tina
Tina is a southern girl, showing off the American way of being sugar and spice at the same time. She’s spunky, but kind. The story behind Tina is that she has ran away from her father for a good time. Tina is one of the better characters for the fact that she has a distinct personality and a background that matches.

Improvements: Sometimes she’s randomly rude to you if you ask her to be your partner, but if you play as her she’s normally semi-sweet. It’s a little inconsistent.


Lisa
I take it back. Lisa is the most bland out of the characters. She has 2 alternating lines that are completely generic and boring. Try again.

Improvements: Everything.


Ayane
Ayane is hot and cold. If you play as her, she’s nice and frisky; if you play as someone else and ask her to be your partner, she’s a jerk. Bipolar?

Improvements: Not only does she not have that much character depth, but she can’t decide who she is. Pick a personality (or lack there of) and stick to it.


Interaction
The interaction in this game is the best part regarding the writing field. Each character is programmed to respond to the other whether or not it’s in volleyball games, casino playing, or jet ski racing. When someone is with a group of people, there is usually more interaction than someone talking to themselves. It’s important to remember those types of things when making casual games.


Final Say:
If you’re looking for a game that’s mentally stimulating, you’ve picked up the wrong game. This game can’t even give you an assortment of female personalities. The interaction between the characters, however, is good and more games should have that sort of interaction.


Other notes: I don’t care if you have 18 different songs. They all suck.

Fable 2

Release Date: 2008 (Xbox 360)
Developer: Lionhead Studios
Publisher: Microsoft

Fable is rather famous among gamers, either being the greatest thing ever or a sad attempt at an action RPG. But gameplay is not what I'm reviewing, so I'm leaving it out of this.

Story Rating: 4/5
Character Rating: 3/5
Mission Writing: 5/5

Warning: Spoilers Ahead. Please skip the rest of this post if you plan on playing the game!

Story
The basic story of Fable 2 is that you play as an orphan boy/girl who buys a music box that is supposed to grant one wish. You and your sister end up in a huge castle where a dude named Lucian flips out and shoots you and your sister. You fall out a window to be saved by a blind gypsy who raises you to stop Lucian from destroying the world. To do this, you must find the other 3 Heroes that are needed to defeat Lucian.

Pros:
--> The dialogue is written wonderfully, giving personality and individuality to each character.
-->I like the idea of actually searching for a few particular people, instead of most RPG games in which you just “run into” people that just decide to tag along for no real reason other than “Hey, I'm going that way too. Let's go together! Tee-hee!”

Cons:
-->A dog that seems to have no real point in the story besides taking a bullet for you at the end
-->Another bad guy that wants to rule the world sort of deal

Characters

Main (Rating: 0/5)
Yes, you play as a speechless character. I understand that this is a sandbox game, but so is Grand Theft Auto 4 and the main character in that game speaks. At least let me have some dialogue to choose from...

Improvements: I don't know...maybe... a personality?

Hammer (4.5/5)
I rather like this character. A buffed-out lady monk who wants to smash in some faces but has to hold back since she's sworn an oath. But once she loses her father, all oaths go out the window and she swears to get revenge on Lucian for his men killing her father. She's witty, chatty, and has fun when smashing things.

Improvements: She didn't seem to have enough faults. Other than being incredibly chatty, there was nothing about her that struck me unpleasant. All characters should have things that you love and hate about them. Not just love.

Garth (2/5)
Garth is a James Earl Jones reincarnate that follows me around telling me to use my magical powers. Sorry guys, but this character is way too Star Wars for me. He has some great moments of wit, but when it comes down to it, all he does is boss me around while sitting in a corner glowing.

Improvements: Needs to be a little more rounded out. Garth didn't say much and when he did, it was barely anything original. I barely know anything about him other than he was in Lucian's hands and I had to break him out of them.

Reaver (4/5)
I hate this character. And I don't mean because he's poorly developed, I just mean that I hated him so much that when I beat the game I wanted to go back, track him down, and shoot him in the face. Reaver is a very arrogant and rich thief, who tricked me into selling my youth to save himself, and then turned around and called Lucian to come pick me up just for his own personal gain.

Improvements: The opposite of Hammer: there was nothing about him I liked. He could shoot a gun pretty well, but that's not reason for me to like him. I almost killed him myself and he's supposed to be a Hero?

Theresa (3/5)
Why are mystical people always able to speak in my head? It's creepy. Theresa is an interesting character, and one that I kept trying to figure out if she was using me for her own plans or if she was actually on my side. She gets the spire and ditches you, which makes you think that the spire was her main objective all along, not to protect the peace. She has no real show of emotions and usually just tells me what to do.

Improvements: How about a mystical character that doesn't state the obvious? Theresa needs a little more depth to her. If I'm supposed to be confused about what side she's on, really confuse me about it. I want to be on the edge of my seat wondering if she's going to betray me or support me. Also, her dialogue sounds more like a narrator than a character.

Lucian (3.5/5)
Lucian wants to create a new and better world. Or an old one... something like that. Someone mentions in the game that he wishes to revive his family from the dead, but that's not really looked into and it doesn't seem like a valid excuse try to change the world into what he wanted. This guy is pretty bad, considering the fact that he shot me in the face twice. And once in awhile you see some sort of heart in him, but it's quickly eaten by his insane mind. With the way he gathered and killed people that didn't fit his view of a perfect world, I'm sure him and Hitler would have a lot of common interests.

Improvements: His motives confuse me at points. I understand that he wants to get rid of the Heroes so he can get the spire to bring his family back. But what's with the recruits for “a better world?” I'd like a little more background on the character that I'm spending the entire game trying to defeat.

Side Quests 5/5
My rating on side quests have to do with these things:

-->Does it fit in with the game world
-->Are the characters in the side quests well developed enough for me to believe that they REALLY need my help
-->Is it something really pointless

Fable has pretty good side quests for the most part. I'm not going to go into each one obviously... I assume you people have lives. (Emphasis on the word “assume.”) Overall, Fable 2 did side quests that immersed you into the world, giving me some memorable characters along the way. How can I forget the heart-warming quest of where a transvestite guy tried to trap me in his house and stab me in the neck after setting fire to all his pets. Good, family-oriented times.

FINAL SAY
Fable 2 has a pretty simple storyline, with good side quest writing. Lionhead Studio said they wanted to focus on the emotion of the game, which I can't say didn't work for the main fact that I got pissed off at half the story because it seemed so unfair. However, there was no part in the game where I was so emotionally distraught that I shed a tear. That didn't happen. And I'm pretty sappy.

I recommend playing it not for the storyline, but for the characters. If you want to study some interesting and insane characters, definitely play.

Other Notes:
Why did I look like a she-man half way through? That was really irritating...